While it’s quite de rigeur for women to have at least one sex toy – and some of us have several – it has been my experience that guys, on the whole, don’t have any interest in trying out the myriad of sex toys available for men.
I surveyed several of the men I know, and the basic feeling was this: “They couldn’t possibly be any good – definitely no better than my hand. Plus, I’d seem like a wuss using a toy – real men just use their hands.”
Privately, I think they’re all terrified of seeming like that “desperate sexual loser-type that you sometimes see hanging out in the back of adult video stores”. But like all phobias, I tend to believe that these fears are not so much based in fact as they are on instinct.
Good Vibrations’ Magazine this month has a great article, written by a man, about sex toys. He’d never tried them before, either, but he tried out a few styles – a vibrator, a Fleshlight (I’ve seen these in Come As You Are and they look amazing) and one of those hand-pumps. As I suspected, the vibe was a good way to get stimulated – ditto the hand pump. But for a good solid orgasm – one that according to him feels much closer to sex than using his hand – the Fleshlight was the toy of choice. I really love the look and feel of these “cyberskin” sheaths and would dearly LOVE to either try one on a man myself or watch him go to town with it on his own.
For men who just don’t understand the appeal, think of it this way: if you enjoy watching a woman pleasure herself with a vibrator or dildo, why not give her some of the visual stimulation right back – by enjoying your own toys?
toys for boys
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